It’s inevitable. You’re having a nice evening with your family and somebody suggests playing a game. Right here, in this moment, you have a decision to make. Do I want to keep these people in my life? If the answer is yes, then maybe suggest watching a movie instead. If you’re feeling risky, then head on downstairs and dig out one of these anger inducing boards of fury and let the good times roll.
10 Board Games That Never End Well
#1 – Monopoly
Nobody quite knows the correct rules to Monopoly; however, that doesn’t prevent people from having strong opinions about them. Luckily, each game comes with a rule book. It may just need the dust blown off it. By the way, Monopoly doesn’t take 4 hours to play if you follow the rules. You must be ruthless and cutthroat and take what is rightfully yours. Will you still have friends when you are done? Probably not. But you’ll be done in an hour.
#2 – Scrabble
credit: Bill Watterson
Every game of Scrabble that you will ever play will result in someone challenging the existence of your words. Next time, given the opportunity, play zyzzyva. It’s a word and your family and friends can suck it.
#3 – Risk
This game has been ripping people apart for generations. I can’t imagine why. Taking over continent after continent until the whole world is under your control, crushing anyone and anything standing in your way sounds like an enjoyable way to spend an evening.
#4 – Pictionary
How every game of Pictionary goes: “How am I supposed to guess the answer when all you did was draw a weird little dog in what I can only assume is a camp fire and then point to them over and over…’hotdog’ oh…..sorry.”
#5 – Sorry!
This game is entirely based on a lie. No one is ever sorry. The whole point of the game is to screw people over. Don’t play this unless you’re confident you can take a punch to the face.
#6 – Scattergories
This is perhaps the worst of them all. Voted most likely to be banned from all game nights. By who? Well we don’t know, we just made that up, but that doesn’t make it any less true. The Letter is “B” and the Category is “Sports Equipment” and your husband writes “bouncy ball”, expecting to get double points. Not if the rest of the room has anything to say about it ya dumbass. And that is how every game of Scattergories goes every time it is ever played.
#7 – Apple to Apples
Much like Scattergories, Apples to Apples relies on players deciding what is the best answer and if something counts. This never ends well. However, if the goal is to resent every member of your family, this is the game for you.
#8 – Uno
Watch out for Uno. It looks sweet with it’s colorful cards and simple rules, but it has been known to tear whole families apart.
#9 – Settlers of Catan
How to play Catan: Plan ahead and skillfully negotiate. How to win Catan: Get away with being the biggest jerk.
Yes, you won, but now everyone hates you. Wanna play again?
#10 – Trivial Pursuit
It’s only a matter of time before the arguing starts. Hours and hours of arguing. Every question makes you feel like an idiot. Who could possibly know that!? Your sister knows it and you want to punch her in her smug little mouth. Always a good time.
So… Who’s up for a game?